Living in Utah, Annette and I have reached that stage where everyone starts asking. Some people approach the subject with more tact than others, but it generally follows the same pattern.
Instigator: "Are you two engaged yet?"
Devon: "No" (or some form thereof).
*brief pause*
Instigator: "Do you think you will be soon?"
Devon: "No plans" (or some form thereof).
*longer, more awkward pause*
Instigator: "Oh. Well, that's OK" (or some other stupid form thereof).
Devon: "Yep."
Now, frankly, I don't mind this exchange. Usually the other person just ends up feeling a little stupid and quickly runs out of things to say. And they're typically deterred from broaching the subject again.
I prefer it this way. I don't see any need to discuss in detail the progress or direction of our relationship. If and when there is an engagement, it will be announced on our terms. Annette, however, pointed out a result of such limited, conversation-stifling communication.
The longer the dating relationship continues with no definitive end in sight, the more people are going to start talking amongst themselves about why Devon and Annette aren't engaged yet, and who is holding the process up.
My instinct is that people will decide it's the other person's fault. In other words, the one they're not directly connected to. A friend or acquaintance of Annette is probably more likely to think Devon has some commitment issues and is stringing her along. An acquaintance of mine is more likely to conclude that Devon has some legitimate reason for not being engaged yet, and it must be something to do with her.
Either way is just fine with me. I think for now I'll just leave it up to everyone else to speculate. It's much more fun.
2 comments:
Just wait until you're actually married and you're casual aquaintances deem it appropriate to inquire about your procreation plans.
I definitely think it's Annette's fault, and plan to interrogate her in short order to get to the bottom of it.
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